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Plant Hands

Photo by Lyn
Thanks so much for your comments and or email. I'm realizing how important it is to feel like this is a shared process. It boosts the energy, deepens the connection, and helps the flow. Thank you for your insights and encouragement.

Okay the long awaited--or not, dream about having plant hands...

So, here I am in my dream, everything is fairly ordinary, other than I have these plant hands. My hands look to be in the shape of human hands, yet they are covered in a pale green corn husk material. Ten long thin fingers extend out like small ears of corn. I seem to be able to bend my fingers only at the knuckles. So, the hands are rather useless in actually trying to pick anything up, or do anything with them.

What makes me take note are the feelings I have about the bizarre hands. I reason, that yes, they are bizarre, and yes, I am extremely uncomfortable, but I have no choice and will just have to live with them. I have to accept what is. So, I go on in my little dream life, with plant hands, wishing it weren't the case, but knowing that it is useless to wish for anything else.

Later in the dream, I start to peel the corn husks off, and there under the green fibrous material are my human hands-my beautiful human skin, flesh, and bones, hands. I feel the shape of my fingers as I hold them together, taking in their contour and their agility, extremely relieved to have them back, hoping the plant material won't grow back.

This dream could be symbolic in many ways, but there are two ways that felt significant to my experience. The first was, the wearing of uncomfortable ideas and beliefs, intuitively out of sync with my own being, but adhered to anyway. It showed me how easily I accepted my fate and went along with it, without question, never thinking until the end to peel them away.

The second explanation that was meaningful showed my attachment to form; to the form of the body, and to my discomfort at anything that deviates from what I would consider normal.

On a deeper level, I have been thinking a lot about how attached I am to the world of form, and how uncomfortable I feel, when form changes, even if it just might be a good thing to have things appear differently. Familiar suffering is better than bliss that feels foreign.

I am at a crossroads in my life in regards to my spiritual growth. I can let myself be guided on a path that feels as though it is being directed by something bigger than myself, or I can stop now and go back to the world as I knew it before, and ignore all of this--which would feel an ultimate betrayal of my being. If I told you about all the synchronicities that are occurring in my life, that blow the mind of my family and friends, you would see how my spiritual path has emerged, and how it has been given to me incrementally in ways that I would best understand at the moment to follow my path. (I believe this is happening for all of us if we want to see it that way). And as I accept one idea, it carries me to the next.

I remember having a personal crisis on hearing some spiritual teachings that were a little too out there for me. I closed up tightly for a while and went back to the familiar constriction of the physical world, in fear of trading one set of doctrine for another. It felt better to rest in the stone-cold arms of logic. But in retrospect that was the beginning for me, the hard crack on the pan that allows the egg to open and to fall out of its shell. It helped me to allow a certain perspective shift, that would allow room for the rest to take hold. It would teach me a lot about myself and it would connect me with a deeper part of my being. It would help me to face my fears and my attachments. I would say, however, that in the beginning, it was like I was tearing those plant hands off in mortal fear of seeing something so drastically different than I could have ever imagined.

As I open more, the synchronicities become even more splendid, but sometimes can be a little scary. It is like I am trying on plant hands one day, maybe plant feet another, and at exceptional moments, a lotus for a head, or a tree for a core. I am experimenting with new ways of being, and feeling out the unfamiliar to come up with an entirely new picture of the world; one that integrates and doesn't separate. Sometimes it is as odd and scary as it is fascinating. It gets me out of my comfort zone. I find myself often inching back to my version of normal, so that I can deal with my life in the world of form. However, I never go entirely back to the beginning, so, there is this sort of dance, out into open space that brings me new understanding and gently nudges me further, careful not to blow my mind beyond what I can handle. And I find that I can never go back, because the world of form is much more peaceful, loving, and inclusive when dealt with from the workings of the heart.

So, this dream was interesting for me to look at closely on a symbolic level, and to see how I am trying on this new paradigm for size. Living from the heart. It has been a return to me and a coming home as I let go of the resistance which would keep me locked in the head and afraid of trusting the heart.

There is no better way to break through the illusion of the physical forms than to mess with your head a little; to see things in a way that you would have never expected. So, I think back about my plant hands and wonder if there will come a time when in my dream state I will come to celebrate changes in form, instead of fearing them, embrace having something so unique. Perhaps someday my default will be to see differences as awesome, like maybe I am being inducted as queen of the plant fairies or pulling a freaky Friday with the plants. Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like to be plant, a tree, or a flower lovingly reaching to the sun? Perhaps I would even weep if my hands were turned back to "normal".

In my other dream life, I am having a lot of fun with form. When I see a form, perhaps someone I normally would have been afraid of, or hear something that I wouldn't have been open to, I stop myself, and just for that moment, I open to hear a song I wouldn't have heard before. Usually I find that I meet myself there. I meet exactly what I am needing to look at in myself, or I meet a version of the person I used to be, and I feel an opportunity to stand in my own truth and lovingly meet them where they are. I see light where it was obscured before. Where I would have felt pity or pain, I see deeper into the soul, and there is a spark of recognition, kind of like love at first sight.

I have noticed this very much with golden folk--people at an age, which when I was little, or even in my performing days, doing my rest home piano tours, evoked great pity in me. These people's lives seemed over as they were sequestered in their little rest homes with the jovial smell of urine. I always thought it would be preferable to be shot, than to waste away in those places.

Recently, I decided to check out a spiritual study group where I happened to be the youngest of all, with the rest being the age which we would deem way over the hill. I had the most incredible moments with them, and it was as if the illusion was permeated by true vision. One night I was talking about the challenges that I couldn't quite get with the teachings, and they poured out heart felt stories and their similar experiences in their lives. Suddenly, I had the strangest sensation that there was no such thing as age, or even time for that matter. All of the sudden, I saw that the aging body meant nothing, and that the spirit was ageless. I felt no different from these people, and I knew that we were all old souls, and that we had been through much to get us to this point of really wanting to see.

Really wanting to see... So, my plant hands were an amazing gift in showing me how I retreated from having the contours of my form distorted. And I had the wonderful opportunity to see it from another angle. We are all one, is the message--even with the plants.
(Oh, and by the way, dear plants, forgive me for having killed many of you, and for not watering you enough. I'm still working on having milk in the fridge for my human children).

Comments

  1. Thank you for your beautiful words, they speak what my soul wants me to know and my heart feels so strongly. Your words are so needed, to be a voice for this world, igniting the soul to remembrance, helping with making the shift, which is truly happening. Thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Integration. I believe it is possible as we take in one layer at a time. A fun practice, similar to what you described about approaching someone new, is to "see" the child face, body, and spirit inside them. I love doing that!! There is instantly a sense of recognition and connection.

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